Parental wishes or prayers

I have a number of these. Not prayers, because I don’t think there’s anything to hear them. But the habit of prayer is a hard one to break, in the silence of my head. Something like wishes, something like prayers.

My current one is this:

Please, let my children grow up knowing how to solve their own problems.

If there is a skill I can teach, if that is even teachable, let me impart it unto them.

I don’t want them to have all the answers. Please, no, not that. Having all the answers makes a person afraid of the world. (Because once you know all the answers, you can never entertain new questions. Newness and changes become your enemy, once you know all the answers.)

But let them know how to solve their own problems. Let them, please, be able to identify what is in their control and what is not. Let them be able to generate options and possibilities. Let them ask for help, let them do research, let them understand that the world is huge and complex and that there are amazing people out there who understand each nook and cranny of it — and really don’t mind telling you.

Let them, please, understand that they are not hapless passengers in their lives.

Let me teach them to solve their own problems.

2 Responses

  1. Amen

  2. Everything you said, but especially this: Let them, please, be able to identify what is in their control and what is not.

    Our biggest issue right now is getting him to stop saying that when things go bad, it’s everyone else’s fault but his. NYARGH. That and the ongoing battle that he doesn’t know everything, and THAT’S OK.

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